An Open Letter to Goalies: It’s Not You. It’s Everyone Else.
By Tendy
Dear Goalies,
I’ve been hearing some rumors.
Apparently…
…we’re the weird ones.
Really?
Let’s review the evidence.
We’re expected to wear forty pounds of equipment.
We willingly stand in front of frozen rubber traveling faster than most people drive through school zones.
We spend hours perfecting butterfly slides.
We talk to our goalposts.
Sometimes we thank them.
Sometimes we apologize to them.
Totally normal.
Now let’s talk about everyone else.
They chase a tiny black puck around the ice because someone else hit it there.
They celebrate by throwing themselves into each other.
They willingly block shots with their feet.
They fight over who gets to stand in front of the goalie while giant defensemen cross-check them in the back.
And somehow…
we’re the weird ones?
Have you ever watched a player panic because they had to put goalie pads on for a team challenge?
Exactly.
The truth is, goalies simply see the world differently.
While everyone else is chasing the puck, we’re reading the play.
While they’re thinking about scoring, we’re thinking three passes ahead.
While they’re trying to beat us…
We’re wondering why nobody appreciates our perfectly organized water bottle.
Let’s also address a few other perfectly normal goalie behaviors.
Talking to yourself?
Mental preparation.
Tapping every post before the puck drops?
Science.
Stretching in ways that concern your teammates?
Necessary.
Having approximately seventeen lucky routines before every game?
Consistency.
Refusing to let anyone touch your gear?
Common sense.
The skaters may not understand.
They don’t have to.
Someone has to bring a little personality to the team.
So the next time someone calls you weird…
Smile.
Adjust your mask.
Tap your posts.
Take one more drink from your water bottle that’s sitting in exactly the right place.
And remember…
You’re not the strange one.
You’re just surrounded by people who voluntarily skate away from the net.
Honestly…
Who’s making the questionable decisions here?
Stay weird.
Or, as we like to call it…
Stay goalie.
🥅 Tendy’s Take: Goalies aren’t weird. We just have higher standards for normal.
